Well, from my recent post about how I see my life as a vision quest, and another I wrote about Randy Pausch's Last Lecture, my life feels like a series of awakenings lately. My post about rediscovering my introverted nature goes right along with those. So am I a brand new man? Not really. I have always been fairly self-aware. I've even been extremely confident in my abilities most of my life. Yet somehow I had let myself fall into a trap of not trusting myself, and not trusting that what I want was a good thing to strive for. Now I am just getting back to my more natural state of believing in myself and in my ability to learn and grow. When I want something, I am quite good at getting it. When it matters to me, I learn new skills necessary to achieve a goal or reach a new height. I just needed to remember those things.
So my recent turn has come from a lot of inspirations - my best friend, my wife, a former classmate, my own desires, and even some promptings I know come from a greater place. I have simply remembered that I can and should continue to grow as a person. I am my best self when I am learning new things and feeding off the energy of my excited brain. That is the person my wife fell in love with, the person that impressed numerous admissions counselors, and the person that will one day stand in front of a classroom full of expectant undergraduates, waiting to hear what the big bald dude at the front has to say. For me to pretend I belong elsewhere any longer would simply be a travesty, a failing on my part, and completely unacceptable. I must continue to push myself, to learn and grow, and to become more. That may not seem like enlightenment, but it qualifies as epiphany for me.